have you ever felt like something "should be"? like love should be sweet, but once you've experienced it, you know it's not? i kind of have that feeling
anyways, summer's pretttty boring. our retreat is on july2-4 so a lot of adults couldn't come, SO the fee went up to $80.. i honestly think it's ridiculous. D: i'd rather sleep at church, as long as everyone's there to make it an amazing praise night :), but eh. i just don't wanna waste $80 like that :T aaaand, right after that is bresee summer camp! whoohooo, hiking in the wilderness during the summer.. sounds wonderful, no? ahaha, welll~ as you guys should know, my life is prettty boring, so i can't really update o_o, but yeap. that's pretty much it, sadly D: till next time :)
June 27, 2009
June 23, 2009
DUHHHH
summer is SO boring. is it cus i don't have anything to do? hehe :p well.. it's still boringgggg. i've just been sleeping, eating, and doing other normal things all day. D: the most eggciting thing that's happened to me so far is: my toilet is constantly flushing.. o_o so we have to get it fixed, but in the meantime, i get to listen to the oh-so-sweet sound of the DAMN TOILET FLUSHING. and i caught a cold.. damn.. way to start off the summer huh? anyways, yeap. i hate when girls get bitchy on their periods! well i can't really hate them, since it's natural, BUT DAMN, some people have to take a chill pill. -_- I HATE GIRLS, especially when they pms.
June 18, 2009
summertime
is finally heree! well not officially,you ya'll know what i mean ;) im still going to school tomorrow... hehe im such a loser. but its to see friends :D it so doesnt feel like summer though, with the cold weather and all :x gosh it sucks to meet a guy RIGHT BEFORE summer starts :( i guess i hafta deal with it ;) teehee~ MOVE ON! anyways, happy summer<3
June 17, 2009
fuck my life
im a failure, haha! im not even going for finals.
per1 is pe, which im utterly failing and cannot bring up to a D even if i aced the finals, which is impossible too o.o 3rdper we took it last week :D now today's day2, and im still at home :) per2 took it last week, per4.. im acing it so doesnt matter if i dont take finals :D god, why is there so much motivation for ditching? -_- yeah but seriously, FUCK MY LIFE. hahahahahahaha
per1 is pe, which im utterly failing and cannot bring up to a D even if i aced the finals, which is impossible too o.o 3rdper we took it last week :D now today's day2, and im still at home :) per2 took it last week, per4.. im acing it so doesnt matter if i dont take finals :D god, why is there so much motivation for ditching? -_- yeah but seriously, FUCK MY LIFE. hahahahahahaha
June 13, 2009
ueless post
hahaha yeap, this is gonna be one useless post :o so i woke up at... 4:30AM today for morning servicee. i REALLY don't want to go, but they keep pressuring me to come. these days.. church isn't even fun anymore. usually people go to church, listen to the sermon, MAYBE a bibly study, then either free-time / go home. but at our church, we get there by 10:40, and stay there till 3 or 4. sometimes 5 or 6. i don't know.. i used to love my church, and i still do. but now that i think about it, it's really very demanding, and what i thought used to be fun, is now just... bleh. after sermon, we had a 30min meeting about what we learned from the sermon. then lunchtime, then another 예배, then group meeting. and on top of that, they want us to come 30 minutes earlier so we can pray before our 예배 starts. and continuing, after the meeting (which is after the 2nd 예배) we have a big group meeting to talk about today's lesson... again. gosh, i mean, i know i sound like the big complainer right now, but it's so stressing! i don't even look forward to sundays anymore, seeing as i have to ride the bus, so i have to get up 2 hours early. although that's not really their fault. but yeah, basically my church schedule's packed, and there's no was so escape. eeeep! is this spiritual dehydration? i don't know. and today, we went to visit my grandma at his grave. i thought it was weird how it suddenly started raining today... ): hope you're happy up there, love you grandpa. <3 he was so mean on the outside, but i swear he was loving and sensitive as hell on the inside. i miss him so much! GOD TODAY IS NOT A GOOD DAY. :T and once again, i'm not looking forward to tomorrow at all. ):
June 11, 2009
some people
really need a reality check. i hate it when people are angry at someone else, and they pour the anger out on you. i mean, i was just calling to see if you were ok, and you give me all this fucking attitude? sometimes i wonder how i put up with it, seriously. well, minus weekends and the last day of school since no one goes, there are exactly 5 more days of school, which is one full school week. hehehe, im happppy. ive so been waiting for summer ;o anyways~ nothing important happened today, so toodles~
June 6, 2009
i'm off to see the wizard,
the wonderful wizard of Oz.
i think that movie shows us (basically) not to judge a book by it's cover. they were all making their happy journey to the 'wizard' who would supposedly grant their wishes, but then they found out he was fake. i think this explains a lot of stuff that happens in life, since we're always hoping, always wishing. it's like expecting your dream crush to be awesome, then he tries to pull a move on you, and you see a totally different side of him. bleh, now that i put it into words, it sounds reallllly retarded. but it sounded like sophisticated in my head :) well anyways. i'm off to my uncle's wedding receptionnn! there's gonna be soomuch good foood and caaaaake, yummm. byeeee~ updates later :)
i think that movie shows us (basically) not to judge a book by it's cover. they were all making their happy journey to the 'wizard' who would supposedly grant their wishes, but then they found out he was fake. i think this explains a lot of stuff that happens in life, since we're always hoping, always wishing. it's like expecting your dream crush to be awesome, then he tries to pull a move on you, and you see a totally different side of him. bleh, now that i put it into words, it sounds reallllly retarded. but it sounded like sophisticated in my head :) well anyways. i'm off to my uncle's wedding receptionnn! there's gonna be soomuch good foood and caaaaake, yummm. byeeee~ updates later :)
June 5, 2009
TGIF
SERIOUSLY. But it doesn't feel like Friday for some reason. Well I found out I got into APENG today, thank you Sandy~! It's weird because I wanted Haas since I heard he was easy, but then I heard Mr. Gartman has high standards and he picked a few people he wanted in his class. I was disappointed to not be on that list :( But oh well, haha. So today was Multicultural Day~! Even though I thought I was early, they were out of In 'n Out. That saddened my day D; But then, they brought more~! And that made my day all better! Then I had a Chemistry test, which I acedddd. And that made my day even happier. Then I got to Trig and realized that I don't remember anything from Trig or Math Analysis. Sucks, I guess I have to studyyy. Which I know I won't do. Well I'm into horoscopes lately, and it's kind of amazing how they're so true. I found two that I think, especially, fit me. But the second one even more so :o
Because Scorps are sexy no matter what, unless they’re fat. Who’s sexy when they’re fat anyway?! Scorps could normally eat whatever they want, and not get fat. But when they hit their thirties, fat attacks them! They don’t show much of their body parts in public. If you go out in private, they look like Whores! They can show as much skin as possible, and would never look unattractive. Scorpio’s have the crappiest tastes possible, that’s because they don’t have a high eye for things. They’re somewhat on the heap scale of spending money. Treat them with care, and oh… they’re very stubborn too. You may appear innocent, unassuming and shy; but we know that Appearances can lie. You can be highly critical of your mate, seeking perfection in both of you. It is not easy to find someone who can meet your standards. You have difficulty expressing emotions and drawing close to lovers. You are often selfish, thinking you are always right no matter what. You never give in. Winning is your prime desire- at any cost. You often forget friends and family and you live in the moment.
I don't want to be fat at 30 & have bad taste in clothes... :(
But I do agree that I am stubborn, to the point of annoying-ness.
And I cannot express my emotions D;<
*Cream Puffs are SOOOOO gooood (=
Almost as delicious as Stephanie, but not quite ;D
Because Scorps are sexy no matter what, unless they’re fat. Who’s sexy when they’re fat anyway?! Scorps could normally eat whatever they want, and not get fat. But when they hit their thirties, fat attacks them! They don’t show much of their body parts in public. If you go out in private, they look like Whores! They can show as much skin as possible, and would never look unattractive. Scorpio’s have the crappiest tastes possible, that’s because they don’t have a high eye for things. They’re somewhat on the heap scale of spending money. Treat them with care, and oh… they’re very stubborn too. You may appear innocent, unassuming and shy; but we know that Appearances can lie. You can be highly critical of your mate, seeking perfection in both of you. It is not easy to find someone who can meet your standards. You have difficulty expressing emotions and drawing close to lovers. You are often selfish, thinking you are always right no matter what. You never give in. Winning is your prime desire- at any cost. You often forget friends and family and you live in the moment.
I don't want to be fat at 30 & have bad taste in clothes... :(
But I do agree that I am stubborn, to the point of annoying-ness.
And I cannot express my emotions D;<
*Cream Puffs are SOOOOO gooood (=
Almost as delicious as Stephanie, but not quite ;D
June 3, 2009
:)? :(?
what does it feel like?
its not fair
these days it seems everyone knows how to be happy
everyones getting to that turning point in their lives
everyone seems to be so bubbly everyday,
everyone seems to know a secret
that only i dont know about.
what does it feel like?
i guess this is just where i can write my shit
and people wont care, cus no one reads it
stuff that would be awkward to talk about w/ anyone
cus no one else understands.
but i really cherish my blogger!
before, i just made it to write stupid crap, and you can see that if you read my past blogs. but now its like my vent. if i want to voice myself out, or talk about something thats been bugging me, this is the first place i come. [on a side note, ive been reading my past blogs and WOW. i sound really gay. but happy, i liked that time. when i was happy everyday, when i had no worries. i was just.... happy. :)]
its not that im NOT happy, its just that there are so many things to think about. and i have so much free time, sometimes those thoughts turn into what if?'s. idkk how to explain this feeling. as my mom would say, "youre just going through a phase." but i kind of want this phase to last, because its helped me to realize that i am not a good person, not at all. but its also helped me to realize something i havent known before, and something i dont know how to express in words. but i guess you can say, i see the world in a different light? and ive also just learned to accept things. i accept the fact that i cant be someone im not. ive also accpeted that i am lazy, and i shouldnt complain about getting bad grades unless i get my ass up to gear. i also see that i make assumptions way too quickly, andl ike.. 90% of it is wrong. well yeah. basically not fml, but not really cheering for myself either. and one more thing, i think i have to start realizing who my real friends are, and who i should really be thanking.
sigh. people are gonna start thinking im emo
but im not. (=
wow this post turned out way longer than expected. i guess im finished now, bye :)
UGH IM SO MAD! i just added more to my post on a new tab and i posted it. then i came back to this tab and it was in the edit section so i clicked "publish post" and now its back to my old one. JFLKDSSJFKLSAJDFJAS I HATE MY STUPID SELF.
its not fair
these days it seems everyone knows how to be happy
everyones getting to that turning point in their lives
everyone seems to be so bubbly everyday,
everyone seems to know a secret
that only i dont know about.
what does it feel like?
i guess this is just where i can write my shit
and people wont care, cus no one reads it
stuff that would be awkward to talk about w/ anyone
cus no one else understands.
but i really cherish my blogger!
before, i just made it to write stupid crap, and you can see that if you read my past blogs. but now its like my vent. if i want to voice myself out, or talk about something thats been bugging me, this is the first place i come. [on a side note, ive been reading my past blogs and WOW. i sound really gay. but happy, i liked that time. when i was happy everyday, when i had no worries. i was just.... happy. :)]
its not that im NOT happy, its just that there are so many things to think about. and i have so much free time, sometimes those thoughts turn into what if?'s. idkk how to explain this feeling. as my mom would say, "youre just going through a phase." but i kind of want this phase to last, because its helped me to realize that i am not a good person, not at all. but its also helped me to realize something i havent known before, and something i dont know how to express in words. but i guess you can say, i see the world in a different light? and ive also just learned to accept things. i accept the fact that i cant be someone im not. ive also accpeted that i am lazy, and i shouldnt complain about getting bad grades unless i get my ass up to gear. i also see that i make assumptions way too quickly, andl ike.. 90% of it is wrong. well yeah. basically not fml, but not really cheering for myself either. and one more thing, i think i have to start realizing who my real friends are, and who i should really be thanking.
sigh. people are gonna start thinking im emo
but im not. (=
wow this post turned out way longer than expected. i guess im finished now, bye :)
UGH IM SO MAD! i just added more to my post on a new tab and i posted it. then i came back to this tab and it was in the edit section so i clicked "publish post" and now its back to my old one. JFLKDSSJFKLSAJDFJAS I HATE MY STUPID SELF.
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